I find within me there are always contradictions, or inconsistencies on what I want to wear, what I want in a lover. When I think I’ve figured out something it twists and changes on me, it becomes something else.
There are days when I want to be dark, demented and terrifying. To wear my leather skirts and big black boots, to be stronger and bolder. To become sexier and have the ability to seduce. And I want to be beaten, be taken by a strong man. To be used for his pleasure and not mine. At this time I want to be tied and gagged, fucked without mercy.
And then I want to be sweet, innocent and perfect. I want to be the sweet girl dressed in something cute and loved. To live in a clean, pure world where everything is vanilla, and white. If I could I’d have two different sides of me. Worlds apar, they would have different lives, different friends.
But even more I love being the sweet innocent girl you see at work, that becomes this sexy dark vixen.
. . . the sweet innocent girl . . . that becomes this sexy dark vixen . . .
ReplyDeleteThe best kind, but perhaps not a contradiction so much as simply a thoroughness of personality.
Why thank you david, makes me think of the song lyrics "lady in the streets but a freak in the sheets"
ReplyDeleteOr, also, "And she aches just like a woman. But she breaks just like a little girl."
ReplyDeleteHmmm that is a good one too
ReplyDelete